‘Single non-white jacket’: RCMP write personal ad to find lost coat’s owner

A jacket with ‘something valuable’ in pocket was found behind North Vancouver Salvation Army

Single Non-White Jacket Seeks Lost Partner. (North Vancouver RCMP)

North Vancouver police are asking the public to help make a “romantic reunion.”

Police issued a tongue-in-cheek news release Wednesday that looked like a personal ad for a “single non-white jacket.”

“You dropped me off on that rainy night, behind the Salvation Army Thrift Store on Fell Street in North Vancouver,” the release said. “But I think you still miss me. Because you left something valuable behind, in one of my pockets. Not a scarf or pair of socks, but something much more valuable. Maybe you just wanted one last chance to hold me?”

The jacket is described as “broad shouldered and nicely tanned,” with an astrological sign of Virgo, and that it’s seeking a Scorpio who wears a size XL.

“By my guess, you’re over 40 (but you don’t look a day over 29!). You know how to treat a jacket. You never labelled me and I loved you for that. You’re clean, but not a neat-freak.”

The news release writer even goes so far as to describe the jacket’s interests.

“I love long walks on the beach and candle-lit dinners. I’m not sporty, but I’m just as comfortable at a pub as I am at the symphony.

“I’m warm, soft, formal, and low-maintenance. I don’t like labels, so nobody can tell where I’m from. I’m well put together, and have never fallen apart in public. Smooth-chested. No back hair!”

The release does not say when the jacket was discovered, but if you’re the owner, your jacket is “missing you” and you’re asked to contact North Vancouver police at 604-985-1311.



joti.grewal@bpdigital.ca

Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter

Just Posted

VIDEO: ‘Spiderghini’ stopping in Abbotsford for Avengers: Endgame

Highstreet Shopping Centre displaying Spiderman-designed Lamborghini for movie premiere

COLUMN: Make positive change for marginalized groups, not despite them

Drug policies have a long history of at best ignoring and at worst targeting vulnerable communities

Abbotsford youth gang prevention program gets provincial funding

But just $1 million over three years is far below In It Together’s previous $1.6-million annual funds

Fraser Health reminds parents to get their kids fully vaccinated against measles

Health authority will send letters home to parents with catch-up program information

Province pledges $25 million to build new Eagle Mountain elementary school

New school for 460 students to be completed by fall of 2022, province says

What’s age got to do with it? B.C. couple with 45-year gap talks happy marriage

An Armstrong couple that has 45-year age gap began turning heads after being featured on show Extreme Love.

WATCH: South Vancouver Island shooting an ‘isolated and targeted’ incident, say police

One person in custody, another fled following shooting and crash on West Shore

Woe, Canada: Bruins down Maple Leafs 5-1 in Game 7

No Canadian teams left in Stanley Cup playoffs

Defence accuses officer of ‘incompetence’ in trial for B.C. man accused in daughters’ murder

Double murder trial for the Victoria father accused of killing his two young daughters continues

Olympic auditions return to Lower Mainland

Event an opportunity for unknown athletes to shine and, maybe, change sports

B.C. men challenge constitutionality of Canada’s secret no-fly list

Parvkar Singh Dulai says he received a “denial of boarding” notification under the no-fly program last May 17

Murder on B.C. property didn’t need to be disclosed before sale, court rules

Buyer had tried to break contract after learning a man with ties to crime had been murdered there

B.C. pedophile wins appeal after violating court order

Kelly Glen Isbister’s sentence was cut by the BC Court of Appeal

B.C.’s largest Vaisakhi festival target of threatening Facebook post: Surrey RCMP

Police say they are investigating the posts on Facebook, after local MLA forwarded screenshots

Most Read