HOLOTA: What makes a good man, according to women

Heads up, gentlemen. As we learned in last week’s column, the majority of women have expectations of their partners that extend past Valentine’s Day, and right through the other 364.

Heads up, gentlemen.

As we learned in last week’s column, the majority of women have expectations of their partners that extend past Valentine’s Day, and right through the other 364.

The wise man, and/or inquisitive researcher would naturally ask then, what might that entail?

I am pleased to present the sequel – What Makes a Good Man.

The first woman I asked replied without hestitation, “Fair play.”

This information passed through my male filters, and immediately shone some light into the chasm that exists between the genders.

“Really?” I said. “Foreplay?”

“NO!” she retorted.

“Fair … play… Like sharing the duties.”


Like vacuuming?


And dishwashing and cooking and dusting and parenting.

After a few more interviews, sharing responsibilities was beginning to trend high, cooking among the top 10.

Ten, the guys ask weakly?

Oh yes. Lots more than 10.

The ability to be a good listener was a favourite – particularly someone who could listen without offering unsolicited advice. Stow all judgment until invited.

Mr. Fix-its are also popular. If you want to hit several key buttons all in one go, you’ll be a multi-tasking Mr. Fix-it who quietly listens and does dishes as he prepares dinner while helping the children with their homework.

Being gainfully employed was also on the female radar. Money is good. Better yet, is a provider who provides equally, if not greater. Best is a man with an outrageous amount of capital.

Being a “good father” also ranks high. In part, this means actively participating in activities – such standing in the thrashing rain on weekends, watching the kid play soccer.

That’s when a sense of humour comes in handy, which was also important to my survey subjects.

Women like to laugh. Mostly with their men, but sometimes at them, unless they are being asses. That is not funny. The definition of that may vary from woman to woman. Reference yours for details.

Being a potty-mouth is not funny, according to one respondent. Being kind, on the other hand, scores big.

However, as the informal polling proceeded, the core theme didn’t change.

Sharing is the operative word, men.

A good man contributes to the coin jar, cleans, cooks and parents.

Oh, and he’s patient, as well.

Just like a woman.

In fact, one of my interview subjects had this to offer on the matter.

“Just clone a woman, and put her in a man’s body.”

…oh boy…

Modern medical science is way too close to making this happen, gentlemen.

I suggest that if you do not know the operating end of a kitchen spoon, do so – quickly.

Don an apron, put a grin on your face, keep your ears open, shut the heck up, learn Grade 7 math, unstick the stuck back door, chase the dust bunnies out of the hall closet, and bring home lots of bacon.

Furthermore, as a female friend told me a while back, a good man does all these things without thinking he’s good. Because that would mean they’re good for a woman to do, but women do them because they need to be done, not because they’re good.

Got it? Good.

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