Good food, fine wine and some intimate conversation: romance is is good for you, according to a Vancouver Island couples’ therapist. Image: Facebook/Quails’ Gate Estate Winery

Romance is more than fun, it’s good for you

Find out not just how to keep those Valentine’s Day fires burning, but why

Romance in a relationship is important, not just on Valentine’s Day but everyday, says registered psychotherapist John Taylor.

Taylor, counsellor at Izumi Therapy in Nanaimo, said making time for a partner is probably the healthiest thing couples can do for their relationship and well-being.

“We talk about the importance of eating healthy and exercising but there’s some research that says 15 minutes of working on your relationship a day would do more for your cardiovascular health than an hour of aerobic activity at the gym because you get rid of all the stress hormones that are so bad for you,” Taylor said.

RELATED: Vancouver Island retailers share the love around Valentine’s Day

Taylor added that romance is something that people should add everyday to their relationship.

“Add as much as you can,” he said.

Taylor said every positive act couples do for each other in a relationship is romance.

“The difference between a romantic relationship and a friendship is that you realize and recognize your partners vulnerabilities and what they need to fill them up and you kind of go that extra level to meet those,” he said.

According to the online blog, Health Fitness Revolution, romantic relationships can be a ticket to good health.

In a post about the connection between health and romance, the author writes that there are chemical processes in the brain that affect how we feel. When we’re with a significant other, the body releases hormones, like oxytocin and dopamine, that signal feelings of trust, pleasure, and reward.

It states that “In one study, researchers found people’s blood pressure was lower when they were with a romantic partner than when they were interacting with anyone else.”

Taylor said one of the best ways to strengthen an emotional connection with a partner is to be an empathetic listener.

“If your partner gets home and says ‘I can’t believe my boss yelled at me, I was five minutes late for work.’ You don’t say, ‘well of course you were late you didn’t get up.’ You have empathy and say ‘that’s really tough tell me about it,’” he said.

If the emotional stuff is working well, Taylor said other aspects in a relationship become easier. He said it’s important to have both sexual and non-sexual connections but that an emotional component should come first.

Valentine’s Day can be a day for couples to be extra romantic, but Taylor said it can also be a difficult day for couples who have little romance in their relationships.

“The expectation is too unrealistic for the day to fix it,” he said. “A good relationship means the job is important and the kids are important but we’re important too. The importance of a couple putting [making time for each other] in their schedule and making time everyday is just as important as getting to work on time,” Taylor said.

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

Two inmates found positive for COVID-19 at Mission Institution; two other tests pending

15 staff self-isolating waiting results, says correctional officer

‘An extra $220 every 90 days’: B.C. patients pay more dispensing fees due to prescription limits

Kelowna woman says it’s outrageous to charge for refills every 30 days

COLUMN: The other graph that shows B.C. can beat COVID-19

Is the curve being flattened? data on hospitalizations provides a crucial answer.

Goose in Abbotsford rescued after legs wrapped up in fishing line

Wildlife centre operator says people need to be more careful

Van der Gulik, McLaren named to Abbotsford Sports Hall of Fame

Hockey pro, softball umpire headlining the 2020 class, which will now be celebrated on Sept. 26

‘Hold our line’: 29 new cases of COVID-19 announced in B.C.

Saturday’s number of new cases marks the lowest in weeks.

Exercises move online with YMCA’s new nationwide virtual workout program

YThrive Home offers dozens of free workout videos for people during COVID-19 self-isolation period

B.C. community service provider hosts friendly art competition for youth

Theme for Pacific Community Resources contest is ‘finding the silver lining in difficult times’

Critic, workers’ group ‘disappointed’ Trudeau chose Amazon to distribute PPE

Amazon Canada said in an email to The Canadian Press that it is working with Canada Post, Purolator

Full World COVID-19 update: National Guard collect ventilators in New York; Spain, Italy improve

Comprehensive coronavirus update with news from around the world.

TransLink to reduce service on some bus routes, SeaBus, West Coast Express

Changes start April 6 ‘due to low ridership and financial pressures’ amid COVID-19

Two people fined after B.C. police spot online ads re-selling 5,000 surgical, N95 masks

Police confiscated the masks, being sold at inflated prices, and now working with Fraser Health

Most Read